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Sheila Schuller Coleman is the firstborn child of Robert H. Schuller, the Founding Pastor of the Crystal Cathedral. Sheila has had a diverse career as a published author (curricula, children’s books, devotionals, and books on family), a public school teacher, and most recently as a private Christian school administrator for over 13 years. She is currently serving as the Director of Family Ministries at the Crystal Cathedral overseeing the Crystal Cathedral Pre-school, Academy, Middle School and High School, as well as the Children’s Ministries and Student Ministries of the Crystal Cathedral. As such, her life has been intertwined with families of all ages in multiple capacities. As a Christian leader she has mentored teachers, principals, preschool directors, youth pastors, and children’s pastors.

Sheila has an Ed. D. in Educational Leadership and Administration from the University of California, Irvine. Sheila and her husband, Jim, have been happily married for almost 30 years. They have four grown sons who are involved in their own careers and academic pursuits.

April 05, 2007

Regrets

Dear Sheila, As Mother’s Day approaches I find myself struggling with the feelings that I have not been a good mother. My children are all grown and have families of their own, but all of them have moved far away. I only talk to them if I call them. They never call me. I had a problem with drinking when they were younger and as a result they were raised by my ex. I understand their anger and lack of trust in me, but is there anything I can do to build a relationship with them while I still have time left? Regrets

Dear Regrets,

As principal of a school one of my duties is to mete out discipline to naughty boys and girls. One day a little boy sat across from my desk, remorseful, and said, “If only I had a time machine…I could turn back the time and undo it, Mrs. Coleman.”
The truth is that ALL of us could say the same thing about our lives. “If only I had a time machine—I would do things differently.” The good news is that even though we don’t have a time machine, we have something better—we have a Savior!
Jesus died for our mistakes. That is wonderful news, and He died for ALL mistakes, even the mistakes that we moms make and tear ourselves up over with guilt, guilt and more guilt. Jesus can help us learn from our mistakes and turn our scars into stars. He can redeem us and make us new.
If you have accepted the grace of Christ in your life, that means forgiving yourself and building a new productive life. It also means that relationships with your family will only heal with time and patience and prayer.
I believe in a God of miracles. Begin by praying and asking God to heal your family. Then admit your mistakes to your children one at a time and ask them for forgiveness. Understand that renewed trust only comes with time.
In the meantime, find others who need you today! Call your local church and volunteer. When you give yourself away to others you will find that you will have turned your scars into stars—with the grace and help of Jesus Christ!
Have a happy mother’s day, knowing you are a child of Christ!

Sheila

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